For mere seconds,...

I wish I was one of those sophisticated people, who knew sophisticated things and worried about the state of the world.
I wish I could understand how people think.
I wish I could become telepathic.
I wish I would know what God thinks of me.
I wish I would understand why I am what I am.
I hate myself.
I hate this world.
I have moods.
I ponder my future.
I realize my naivety.
I regret, feel guilty and redeem.
I live within the "what if" state.

For mere seconds, I am human and for mere seconds I understand everything and nothing. For mere seconds, I live not knowing how or why, for mere seconds I question my existence, for mere seconds I declare my insecurities. For mere seconds, I become myself and someone else. For mere seconds, I am.


jessyz said…
:-) apparently everyone wants something for a few seconds.
Cesario said…
ain't that the truth?
marooned84 said…
I respect people like that. it's better than living for fun, or believing a conventional shallow sort of belief.
Cesario said…
but those who're shallow live a peaceful life. It's like the working bee who's never seen the outside of the hive, contently buzzing away, not understanding the perils of the world.

Add to this the constant headaches and wondering whether it's the right thing to do, whether you're affecting ur chances of a decent life, bla bla bla, on and on until you hate the universe.

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