Thursday, September 04, 2008

How much of a feminist?

Ok, I know the last post (written 2 minutes ago) was about feminism, but it's quite an issue for me.

I am just wondering whether I am a true feminist or am I just faking it? I mean, if one of the women who led any feminist movement in the world saw me in my day-to-day life, would she be proud?
Sure, I don't care about people's opinion, but in this particular case, I want to care.
I mean how much of a feminist am I? Sometimes, I think I am a pretty good one, and other times I believe I am kidding myself. The point is that nowadays, feminism isn't given any care, people think a lot of negative things about it because they don't understand it, while other women take it as a way to become selective rather than equal.
As for myself, feminism means being given an equal chance to compete and the rest depends on you as a person, I don't use feminism as a way to have more than I am entitled to, or use it in petty conversations.
I used to be a bit of an extremest as a teenager, but then I toned down my intensity and became rather a masked feminist. I do advertise it, but only when asked about it. Is that right?

Anyhow, due to my naive nature, I always assume that any woman I meet is actually a feminist and to my disappointment, a lot of them usually deny it as if it's a disease.
I guess I usually become doubtful about my feminism sense when I become a softie, or when I give excuses. In the end I do hope that I am practicing what I am preaching. we Ramadan Kareem.

5 comments:

marooned84 said...

I believe in equality, but I don't know what feminism is to he honest, I mean I don't understand it. It made sense 30 years ago. I would've loved 2 talk about it, really.

You wanna hear something funny: I was talking to a colleague of mine in uni last year, and she said she belives the husband should never let his wife spend a dime on the household, that she should save her wages or spend it on herself, and that a man who expects his wife 2 share in the welfare of a new family is not a man!

talk about equality!

Cesario said...

Wallahy mawdoo3 el income da, it depends on the couple, but if we're talking religiously, Islam said that a woman isn't demanded to financially supply for her household, it's originally the husband's responsibility. Personally, I think the husband shouldn't have to ask, I mean they're sharing their life together, they both should be attuned to each other's needs, but of course I am talking about a perfect world.
Having said that, women are the ones who can make or break a marriage, they are the pillars and this is quite the job even if they're not actually working. In addition, they get pregnant, have kids and raise them. I mean they DO a lot, so if the woman doesn't want to spend money one her family, it's her own desire and I think it should be acknowledged by her husband. At the end, I think en el nas lazem yekoon 3andohom shewayet a7mar, either man or woman.

marooned84 said...

believe it or not, that was 90% of the opinion that I was so shaffed about! Marriage is an agreement between a man and a woman, and in they are free to agree on anything they like, nothing would make a man less or more manly, that was my point. I can also add that imcomes vary, and it's not so rare these days 2 find a wife getting more than her husband. what I really object to is people trying 2 get their noses into it (especially the relatives) and whether there are 2 married people or 2 married families, if u know what I mean.

anyway, marriage to me now is something almost mythical. that's why I only look to the ideal side of it, which has no family interferencre AT ALL.

Cesario said...

Whatever you do or say, you have to keep in mind that we're very much affected by our eastern traditions and whether we want to or not, they seep into our way of thinking. Not all eastern traditions are wrong, but some of them are just plain stupid.

In this day and age, marriage has become distorted. People get married and they don't even know why they're doing so.
Yet, I think that families aren't the problem, all the problems stem from the married couple and the lack of communication between them.

Anyhow, it's a very complicated concept and people usually rush into it, resulting into more complication.

marooned84 said...

I totally agree about marriage and the eastern customs (or u can say customs in general, every culture has its own outdated customs) and from what I see and hear, people get married usually because they're bored, or they want 2 get on with their lives and dunno how 2 do it but with that. there are also those who earn money and dunno what 2 do with it, so they marry and spend a lot and have children who usually turn out spoiled.

I still think families are a part of the problem though, I just hate how they want 2 interfere in every single detail.

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