Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Am I?

I think we take ourselves too seriously; when you watch people walk you get a feeling of how they actually think and how they want to portray themselves. It's strange how important people think their lives are and how great they should be. It's weird that they believe that they deserve things and that the universe should just give it to them.

As I sit in the empty meeting room, walking around and looking from the window, which basically looks into other people's offices and the smoking balcony, I watch as people come into the balcony to smoke. Serious, no make it grave, looks etched on their faces, walking in a way to suggest the domination of the air around them. They offer cigarettes to each other and speak of matters that should be considered important. People who believe that they're going places and as I watch this scene, inside of me, I laugh. I mean my sister accuses me of taking life too seriously when I have just figured out that maybe I am not even considering life, let alone take it seriously.

To be honest, I used to take it seriously, it used to be a matter of -no kidding- life and death. Yet, after so many disappointments and shallowness within the world, I have become more lenient, more forgiving and more humorous. I have changed drastically, but I don't believe that people around me acknowledge this change, I think that most don't even notice it. It's not their fault, it really isn't apparent; I am after all the same on the outside and as far as behaving goes, there are no major changes in my behavior.

I just wish that maybe people didn't take things so seriously, or maybe I become more structured, but really in the end, Am I bothered? I think not.

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