Friday, January 01, 2010

My dearest Universe

1st of January, 2010


My dearest Universe,

I write to you on the very first day of the very first year of the decade just to let you know that I am not doing so well, I am not feeling alright and I don't see myself within this world. I know that there's so much to see, but will I be able to see it? Will I be able to experience all the great things about life? I don't know, but you do.

I just wanted to let you know that I am sorry for wasting so many years wishing I didn't exist and self-destructing, I am sorry I wasn't ready for life when you shove it in my face and I am sorry for not being the person I should be. I have made many choices in my short span and I must say that the hardest of these choices are being made right now, because I have been very much a child through all of these years, but I won't be anymore, no, it's time I was ready for the next thing you put me through.

Life is so alien to me and I don't know what my purpose in it is and whether I do have a place in this world, but I do know that I will try to be better, I will try to please you more often and maybe if I do good by myself, you will do good by me. I am sorry, I really am, for doing what I am doing, but I know that resisting the things that I indulge in will pay off eventually. So, I will put off momentary happiness for the sake of a more substantial version of it. I just hope that you would help me every now and then, because I have never felt weaker.

Sincerely and forever yours,

Sina

3 comments:

Deeeeeee said...

:)

Brownie said...

I think the universe understands you more now...May God grant you all what you wish and good for you.

hrp3r said...

that was deep.

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