Familiarity is something we desire and seek out, and when we find it , we cling to it,even when it hurts us. The past represents something familiar, thus we attach ourselves to the present,which is the last model of the past.
I guess that's why we stay in unfulfilling jobs,deny our flaws and mourn our dead.
The second perspective is the most troubling, as it is very hard to let go of your personality. The personality represents a pattern, or a blue print, which tells you how to behave.
So, when you change your personality, you have to devise a new pattern, and get used to it. It's very hard work, that requires time.
In addition, you don't know how people will react to this change.
So, to required change may it always be gentle.